CALL MY BUTT OUT

[perfectplaces]

more options tba. any kind of prompt!

Comments

TFLN - ANGO

[angony]

1. Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm. Nor do any other emotions.
2. I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
3. I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
4. So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently enraged is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
5. I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.

1

[authorialintent]

2pm? That's an arbitrary time. I'm certain I've seen you frustrated before 2pm.

[angony]

I consider "frustrated" to be more of a state than an emotion.

[authorialintent]

Mmm, that's fair.
What happens at 2 o'clock?

[angony]

My best guess is that the nicotine, caffeine, and sugar levels in my bloodstream finally combine to create just the right chemical reaction for maximum efficiency.

Or maybe that's when I actually wake up.

[authorialintent]

Funny, I always pictured you as a morning person.

[angony]

Hilarious. Har har.

[authorialintent]

I'm serious.

2

[unsnarl]

Seeing as we both know what happens when you combine me with any of those things, I'm going to go ahead and guess... wrong number?

[angony]

Mm.

[A noise of assent, of confirmation - one that Ango uses so often in person that the sound of it will likely be familiar even over text.]

Wrong text as well, as it happens. In the sense of incorrect. I've never missed anything like that about anyone in my life.

[So drunk dialing? Highly likely.]

[unsnarl]

[ Oh. Well, that clears that one up. ]

On purpose, or...?

[angony]

I hope I'm more clever than straightforward "made you look" sarcasm when I set out to insult someone.

No, not on purpose.

I may have had some hard liquor of my own.

[unsnarl]

Was it a special occasion, at least?

[angony]

Close enough. Call it an anniversary.

Apologies for interrupting some of your rare, undoubtedly precious time without me breathing down your neck this way.

[unsnarl]

At least I wasn't interrupted by bad news.

[ Unless it's a bad kind of anniversary and he just put his foot in his mouth? Hm. ]

[angony]

[It is a bad kind of anniversary, but Ango's totally down for not talking about that part of it anymore, so he'll let the entire thing slide.]

The man in charge of your safety and the safety of the entire city being a maudlin drunk dialer in his off time isn't bad news to you?

[unsnarl]

It means that you're human. And the city is still standing. So am I.

Is there anything I can do?

[angony]

[Heh. That should be comforting, but Ango's got a complicated relationship with feeling indispensable, so it actually lands as a mild insult.

He knows that's not how Florian means it, though, which is enough to improve his mood somewhat.]

Not at the moment, but you could come drinking with me next time. For the social and symbolic value, mind you, no alcohol required. I haven't had anyone to drink with in quite some time.

[unsnarl]

I mean, with you around? It could be a little more manageable, but I don't think anyone wants me to grow trees in their bar, so never mind.

Can you put water in a whiskey glass? Is it allowed?

[angony]

Or soft drinks, or tonic water. I used to have tomato juice when I knew I'd be driving later. In fact, if you identify yourself as my post-one-too-many driver, you'll be treated with nothing but respect.

Agreed about further experimentation; we'd best keep it out of public places if it happens at all. I don't get paid nearly enough to deal with disaster cleanup.

[unsnarl]

[ 'Treated with nothing but respect'. Doesn't that sound lovely to a lifelong easy target for bullies? That's part of why Florian instinctively doubts that would ever (ever) be the case, but it's a nice thought. And a thought that's effectively over-thinking that one line of text. ]

So I'm a walking disaster? Ouch.

[angony]

Not a very astute assumption, given that I'd never dream of taking on this position if you were.

[That's kind of a compliment, or at least "no, you're not a walking disaster," which is close when it comes to Ango.]

One thing you learn very quickly in my line of work is that only situations are disasters, Hadley-san, not people. I prefer to work in disaster prevention as opposed to clean-up, which makes you a potential disaster, not a perpetual one.

[Not that compliments from him are EVER straightforward.]

[unsnarl]

See, I have to disagree with that. Some people are definitely walking disasters. But as long as I have potential!

[ He can only hope (or assume) that Ango can find the attempted humor in that, as Florian very often only gets a medal for there was an attempt. It's been said that it's part of his charm...?? ]

What are you up to now?

[angony]

[Pffff. He appreciates the humour very much.]

You may have a point. Let me just assure you that I've known, dealt with, and worked with worse, and probably even counted worse among my friends at one point or another. The true nature of humankind quickly gets even more terrifying when you add superhuman abilities.

[Which Florian certainly knows, since his "curse" must have come from someone with a particularly nasty ability - or at least that's the government's take on it at the moment, and Ango agrees.]

Now? Wrestling a pile of paperwork. I'm open to alternative suggestions.

[unsnarl]

I believe you. I know I'm not very good at this, but I always... you know. Try.

[ The tale of how his ancestors got the curse has been retold into oblivion, so much so that it's simply attributed to some witch-type figure without any real characteristics, and certainly not a name. No one really knows what the curse is, so there's nothing they can do about it, and it's probably for the best that those who can be trusted with the truth are just as interested in keeping it a secret. It's one of the very few things that make Florian feel comfortable with this (business?) relationship, but it's also very significant. ]

Dare I ask what the paperwork's about?